I ventured into the realm of grain-based milk a few days ago, and I must admit my first foray has not been a smashing success. I followed all the directions to make oat milk “not slimy,” only to be met with a jar full of something akin to cream-colored phlegm. I mean, after soaking them, I rinsed those oats for what seemed like 30 minutes!

Anyway, I imagine I will try again at some point in the far, far, far distant future, but for now, I’m a bit battle scarred and skeeved out. I’ll be sticking to my tried and true soy-based and nut-based milk for a little while, until all the yuck finally wears off…

Oh! And the good news is that all is not lost – I can still use the “oat milk” in the bath for silky soft skin tonight (because you can bet your ass I’m not going to be drinking it).


Taking it Personally

I’ve noticed for quite some time the increasing entitlement of Americans – this affliction is, in fact, something I’ve struggled with from time to time myself. It’s that whole, “I don’t want to wait; I want what I want and I want it right now, even if it stands in your way of getting whatever it is you want” thing and it’s something I acknowledge and work on consciously. We are all so very, very important to ourselves, are we not?

For instance, have you ever been in the grocery store and someone hasn’t moved quickly enough when you’ve asked, ever so politely three whole times, for them to please excuse you so you can pass by them or so you can look at something they’ve parked their cart in front of and that they aren’t even looking at? I mean, how long does it TAKE to read the label on a box of cereal, and who even DOES that – am I right? So, you either stand there, arms crossed and toe-tapping impatiently, thinking all sorts of awful things (like what a cretin they are for purposely ignoring you, and if only they could have a heart attack right there in front of their stupid Wheaties so you can get on with your busy day), or you stalk off, muttering unpleasantries just loudly  enough so they can hear how unforgivably they’ve inconvenienced you. How DARE they, anyway – don’t they realize how very, very important you are?! Aaaand you end up carrying the indignation with you throughout the store, glaring holes at that person every time you come across them in a new aisle…

Does any of this ring any bells of familiarity?

So, maybe that person IS standing there on purpose to make you wait (they were there FIRST, for Pete’s sake, so WAIT, sucka!). I’ve noticed that Americans have gotten even less kind, less friendly, and more likely to do ugly, spiteful things just for the sake of doing them. We ARE all “the most important person,” after all. Maybe that person honestly didn’t hear you the all those times you politely asked them to move their buns, so it’s all a big misunderstanding. Maybe that person isn’t really in as much of a rush as you are, so they aren’t inclined to move until they’ve finished reading that label, even if it DOES hold you up for 2 whole seconds.

In the instance of any of these “maybes” I set forth this challenge: SO WHAT?

Erm…say what?

True, human beings are a nuisance – a bother, if you will. But as a card holding member of humanity, that means that I’m every bit as annoying to someone else as they are to me (and the same goes for you…and you…and especially you). I’m not the “most important” to anyone but myself, just like whatever it is someone else is doing isn’t really all that important to me. I posit that in general, no one is trying to bug anyone else – we’re just doing our own thing, absorbed in our own version of this world, and not intending to impact anyone else’s day in any way at all. It isn’t intended to be personal, even if it impacts us in a personal way.

Armed with this outlook, I’m more able to let sh*t go, and more able to feel peaceful in situations that otherwise would have made my blood boil. I take a deep breath and I make myself smile and wait patiently for my turn or I smile and come back to the aisle later. The key here is acknowledging the utter lack of my own importance in the grand scheme of things, which makes everything seem so much less serious.


Whew, last week was a whirlwind – on Sunday, my younger daughter was experiencing extreme discomfort with her pregnancy. The doctor asked her to head to the emergency room, and once there, they determined she was suffering with a severe variant of preeclampsia called HELLP Syndrome. Her platelets weren’t allowing her blood to clot, her liver was enlarged, and her blood pressure was 210/130 (really, really bad); if she had waited another day, my story today would be very different. The wonderful doctors and nurses induced her right away (at 34 weeks), and she delivered our newest sweet granddaughter, Paisley, at 12:30pm the next day, weighing in at a diminutive 3 pounds, 15 ounces. The whole thing was touch and go – at one point there was discussion about who to save, mother or child, so we are very fortunate to have both of our sweeties alive and doing as well as they are. And that tiny, tough little girl is simply, inarguably precious.

Today, just over a week later, all I can muster (aside from exhaustion) is gratitude. Thank you, Universe, for protecting them both and allowing us to keep them with us. Thank you. Thank you.

Today is a nearly exhilarating day – we have canceled our subscription to “cable” (Directv)! I mean, yeah, maybe it’s kind of a nutty idea, but we are spending $150 a month for something we just never watch, in addition to our subscriptions to Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, and Sling. If we sit in front of the tube at all, it’s always to watch one of those applications, never cable, so what is the point? It seems any time we even turn a television on, we spend more time bitching about how there is nothing to watch than we do actually watching. Naturally, I had to up our data package with the ISP, and they gave me a TON more data for less than I’m spending NOW! Total score! J

So, now I’m sitting here feeling quite smug (and I’m sure hubby will be slightly panicked, but has agreed that this makes the most sense for us since we’re not using it anyway), and thinking of what I can spend all this extra money on…grandbabies, most likely. Or shoes.

For many reasons, besides telling cable where to go, today is a good day.

Recently, I have felt ever-so-slightly left out in the cold. Vegan friends have looked at me, utterly appalled at my proclamation, so why stop with friends? I’m going to just throw it out here on the World Wide Web for all to see: I hate quinoa. HATE it. With an undying passion.

It isn’t a flavor thing at all – this loathing is based entirely upon appearance because apparently I’m just… that… shallow. I can’t help it. All those weird little squiggles that stick out of the round seed part…GROSS. I can’t get past it – every time I see it, I think of fish eyeballs and then I’m done before I’ve even started.

Sure, perfect plant protein and fiber and minerals and all 9 essential amino acids and blah blah blah…but…yech. I get it – it’s good for you but why does it have to look so wrong?

People who are fans of this heinous little seed throw things at me like, “Well, you haven’t tried it the way *I* make it!” or, “Have you tried cooking it *THIS* super groovy way?” and I’m all, “Hells no. I can’t look at the stuff, so maybe if you hide it in a smoothie, I can choke it down – otherwise, no dice.”

Rave all you want to, I’m not buying it. I guess I’m stuck outside of the cool kids’ clique on this one, because I don’t see me overcoming this aversion anytime soon.




Odds’n’Ends Juice

I was drinking one of my “odds and ends” juices this morning and while frequently I hit a home run with a crazy-random mixture, today’s was less… enticing. I mean, I wouldn’t necessarily call it bad, but I don’t think I will attempt to recapture the ingredients and amounts so I can do it over again. Today’s mishappish-mishmash of leftover misfits was: watermelon, apple, lemon, cucumber, red bell pepper, carrot, and kale. Not terrible, but not exactly special in any way either. The point is, when you’re trying to use up leftovers so you can buy new stuff, you should anticipate an occasional funk-fest (I’ve done a lot worse than this one, believe me). Drink it or compost it, but move on and don’t spend a lot of time obsessing. Who’s got time on their hands for self-defeating commentary – am I right?

As a complete aside, I went to a Mediterranean place for lunch and for some unknown reason, the kid behind the counter always gets really skimpy with the romaine lettuce. Now, I don’t know how anyone else feels about it, but this isn’t supposed to be sprinkles. Count the falafel if you must, but lettuce is cheap and good for you – go crazy.

I’ve had to drive to the office twice this week and honestly, that 4am wakeup call is kicking my butt. I shouldn’t complain – I have commuted a grand total of 4 days the entire summer – but whew. Thankfully yoga calls to me at any hour and it helps me to get the blood flowing to my brain so I can function at that unheavenly hour.

This morning, I was considering which adorable yoga outfit to put on (leaning heavily toward my “kinda classy kinda hood” tank top with totes adorbs floral yoga capris), when it occurred to me – there isn’t really a yoga dress code in my house. I could just wear my pajamas and get all bendy-stretchy without the help of sexy duds. Who would even know, besides me?

And so, I did – and it wasn’t weird. In fact, it didn’t seem to have any impact whatsoever on my focus or overall bendiness. I wouldn’t say I noticed any difference at all, other than I had one less outfit to wear and wash later. Hmmmm…I could be on to something.

I mean, what is yoga anyway? Yoga is spirituality and physical discipline. It’s getting your mind and your breath in sync, which helps you to focus better during meditation (and the rest of life). Yoga is building biceps and stamina and flexibility. But what yoga is NOT is a fashion show, especially when you’re all alone with your yoga mat at 4am.

So, who knows? Maybe I’m going to end up one of those wrapped-up-in-a-twisty-scarf-and-nothing-else yoginis eventually. Or maybe today was just a particularly lazy day when too many outfit options left me overwhelmed and so I just gave up… like a total quitter. I dunno. But I DO know that what matters is the yoga – not the clothes.

How is it that this summer is nearly half over? It feels like only yesterday, we were opening the pool (and grossing out over the olive-green algae bloom we discovered for the first time ever)!

Not much has changed – I have been faithfully administering my yoga/meditation/green juice daily “medicine” and really feeling better than I have at any other point in my adult life. We haven’t done a whole lot of camping/roadtripping (we took at 10 day hiatus to Wyoming over Independence Day), but it’s been kind of a nice change from last year when we forgot what our yard looked like – the bonus of having the RV parked right at our own house now, instead of in storage, perhaps has taken away our will to use it so often? Or maybe we’re lazy? I dunno. I’m not much for travel when the temperatures soar, anyway. Give us a few weeks when the sun cools down and the only part of us most people will see are our taillights.

I’m not feeling particularly eloquent today, but hey, it happens. At least I can tell my bullet journal that I reconnected with the blogosphere. 🙂 A girl’s gotta have goals, ya know?

I hope this message finds everyone happy, healthy, and appreciating the gift of another day!

Life is good.

Hey gang, sorry to have been MIA for a few days – I’ve been living life and, consequently, I’ve neglected writing about living life. 🙂 We’ve been camping and hanging out in our gardens and pool, and just generally doing all those summertime things that will be impossible to do altogether too soon, when autumn winds begin to blow winter our way. Hard to imagine in light of the current heat waves, but it’s coming – it always does.

I’ve found that when I’m feeling most settled and in a gentle, but happy, rut, I write less. Why is that? Maybe it’s because when I’m in the middle of a sh*tstorm or when I’m trying something exciting and new, there is more to talk about? Or maybe during those times, I just need help sorting out what I think/feel about things, so I start to pound the keyboard with more enthusiasm than I can muster when life feels “normal.” Hmmmm…something to ponder….another day….

It’s been 105 days since I started juicing every day, since I started meditating (nearly) every day, since yoga became a driving force and crow pose started looking less like an uncommonly torturous maneuver and more like a real possibility (I’m totally getting there – I can get my toes off the ground for a few seconds at a time, but I still keep chickening out when it comes to holding it for longer – there is a lot to be said for a healthy fear of falling forward and knocking all one’s teeth out). It’s been 105 days since I decided that “being vegan” wasn’t enough and started making healthier choices for myself, so that it didn’t feel like a silly, pointless word. Now I can call myself a “mostly raw vegan” and it feels meaningful to me – welcome whole plant foods that haven’t been created in a plant!

Gone are the chemical-laden cosmetics and household cleaners! Gone is most of the stinkin’ thinkin’ that could so easily hijack my day and send me into multiple mini-funks (I say “most of” because, hey, I’m human). Gone is the obsession with whether I’m doing life right – what does that even mean?? I have no idea, but believe me, I used to spend a lot of time worrying about it.

Life IS good. I hope this is true for you, wherever you are.


So, these past few days I’ve been noticing a rather unpleasant grumpiness inside myself, manifesting itself outwardly. I was thinking at first that maybe meditation was just not working, and that all this zen I’ve been filling myself and my life up with had somehow dripped and oozed away from me, like so much primordial slime. I mean, how does one know if there is actual progress and that they’re not backsliding into old habits, if they can’t actually feel something tangibly gorgeous all the time? It is concerning, when you think perhaps all the effort you’ve put into something has been a waste.


Yesterday I read something; I don’t recall it verbatim, but the gist was this: it is unlikely the meditation isn’t doing its job – what is more likely is that I’m noticing, not having, unpleasant grumpiness more, BECAUSE I’m meditating and better in control of my thoughts.

That’s kind of an interesting way to look at it, right?

Looking more deeply at my mood, I realized I am not actually feeling more grumpy in general at all. Quite the contrary – I’m feeling so much more chill and happy these days that when I’m having a self-inflicted suckfest of major proportions, I totally recognize it and can much more easily flip the switch back to “normal.” See, meditation isn’t so much about feeling nothing but peace – it’s about noticing what’s different and being able to get yourself back to peace when you’re not feeling so zen at all (like when you’re stuck in traffic and swearing a blue streak under your breath and questioning the intelligence of everyone else on the road).

Of course we all fall back into old ways of thinking/being from time to time. Life is a whole lot of one step up and two steps back action. The thing is, progress is a lot more fun than perfection.


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