The Perfect Pie Crust

Many of us who make pies from scratch have crust recipes which have been passed on from generations before us.  We swear by these recipes, because they turn out flakey and delicate most of the time.  Problem is, what I have heard time and time again is that pies are difficult to make simply because crust can be such a fickle mess to work with.  It falls apart when you try to put it in your pie pan, or if it holds together beautifully, often it bakes up with the texture of boot leather. 

And get this – some bakers don’t even bother with the crust and instead buy the flavorless mats sold as “unbaked pie crust” sold at the grocery store, simply because it’s easier.  Never mind the flavor – the dreamy pie filling will make up for a lackluster crust.  If you say so, pal.

Well, I have the solution to your pie crust quandry!

I, like most, have struggled once a year with rolling out pie crusts that required me to piece together the crust in the pie tin, resulting in a somewhat Frankenstein-esque pie.  Sure, it got the job done, but often it wasn’t very pretty.  But, several years ago, my friend Tyler brought in a pie with a crust so flakey and gorgeous, I complimented him on accomplishing such a lovely pie, noting how ornery pie dough can be.

Tyler looked at me questioningly, and said that pie crust is no big deal.  Well, of course I asked him his secret and he told me there wasn’t one.  He just mixed up a batch of dough from the recipe his grandma gave him and it turns out every time.  Hmmmm.  Every time?  Surely Tyler was full of something (and I don’t mean mincemeat).

Anyway, long story short, I asked him for the crust recipe (thinking it would be the same one I’d always used), and like a good friend, he delivered the very next day!  But, his recipe was kinda weird.  I’ve never heard of using eggs or vinegar in pie crust – surely this couldn’t be right.  Well, I took the recipe home, and whipped up a batch just to be sure, figuring it would be a test batch that I would just bake blind with cinnamon and sugar for the kids.  And lo and behold!  It worked!  Stirred together quickly.  Held together perfectly.  Was flakey and delicate and pretty much the ultimate in pie crusts (in my experience).

So now, my fellow bakers, if you don’t already have it, here is Tyler’s grandma’s recipe, just in case you’ve never seen one like it.  From here on out, you have no excuse for not baking pies more than once a year (other than that unfortunate 10 pound weight gain excuse).

Perfect Pie Crust

4 cups flour
1 tsp salt (I added this, because it just seemed to need it)
1 3/4 cup shortening (I use lard or Crisco interchangeably)
1 egg
1/2 cup water (doesn’t have to be ice cold)
1 TBS white vinegar

Cut together flour, salt and shortening, until the mixture is crumbly and crumbs are about the size of peas.

Stir in the egg, water and vinegar until thoroughly combined.

Form into a ball, wrap tightly and refrigerate for at least 2 hours before rolling out on a floured surface.

Pumpkin Shortage? Thankfully, Not at My House.

I read today about the failed crops of pumpkins grown this year that are typically used to can pumpkin for all us Thanksgiving bakers for our holiday pies.  Apparently there are expected shortages of pumpkin and what you DO find will cost you an arm and a leg.  $2.99 for a can of the lovely orange glop here in Colorado.  TWO DOLLARS AND NINETY-NINE CENTS???  Ah, the Law of Supply and Demand in action!

Anyway, I hope non-farm folks understand that while they are disappointed to either not have pumpkin pie or irritated that the pumpkin costs so much, the men and women who counted on pumpkin as a cash crop to feed their families are likely far more disappointed/irritated/you-name-it than anyone else could possibly be.  When you are dependent on Mother Nature for your income, there are no guarantees.

BUT, if you are in dire need of pumpkin and you live relatively near to where I do, northeast of Denver in Colorado (shoot me a comment if you want to check), I am happy to share some of the pumpkin I grew this year in my garden.  Because while my tomatoes drowned and blighted in the cold wet summer we had, the pumpkin (for whatever reason) flourished.

And, if you aren’t nearby and you can’t find pumpkin, the Target flyer I got this week says they are selling sweet potatoes for $0.59/lb until Saturday – I’m guessing most members of your family will never notice the substitution!

Labor of Love

Hello all…

I’ve been under the weather and honestly, this cold is kicking my patootie!  Sorry I’ve been remiss in my blogging duties - every day I tell myself I’m on the mend, though looking at me today you’d never believe it’s true.  Putting it plainly, I’m a mile of bad road.

So, really quick I’m going to tell you how the quilting is going because to be honest, yesterday I was getting very grouchy with the process and with the time constraints.  Then it hit me.  This is a labor of love.  It’s supposed to be fun.  It’s supposed to be something that makes me smile and hum happy little tunes about – something I’m pouring lots and lots of good energy into, so that when my family is wrapped up in literal warmth, they will be wrapped up in warmth of a more metaphysical nature, too.  And to give myself a break, up until yesterday this truly has been an enjoyable chore. 

Last night, while I was ripping seams and bitching about how the squares weren’t lining up just so, I made myself set down the project to avoid contaminating it with any negative vibes.  And right then and there I had an epiphany: when I’m sick, I’m a moody ol’ hag and therefore in no shape to create gifts for people I love.  And if I’m not making these quilts out of love, what’s the point anyhow?

Mall Crawl

This isn’t a recent development, and typing it out for the world to see will likely ruin my shopping cred, but I hate malls. I’m not picky, either – I hate them all. It isn’t so much the fact that all that excess is just plain gross. No, mostly It’s the fact that when too many people are in the mall, they seem to lose all manner of cognizant thought and every smidge of upbringing.
I’m not sure what causes this phenomenon, other than the glare from all that artificial lighting. But add a stroller for every second shopper to the fray and you have sheer chaos. Heaven help us all if there happen to be sales!
Can anyone tell where I spent a large portion of my day today? The things I do for my daughters.

And She Said “Let there be more plastic junk in the world,” and There Was.

Today, after a positively wonderful coffee lunch with my writer friend, Erin, my mom and I took Skye to the mall so she could purchase a phone case for her cell phone.  I have to tell you, I was kind of grossed out by all the racks and racks of cellophaned packages of plastic cell phone covers and cases.  They all seemed to me extremely high priced junk, the purchase of which causes need for more high priced plastic junk to be manufactured.  It’s a vicious cycle.

*deep breath*

I have to remember that way back in my super-consumerist, pre-I’m-so-much-better-than-you-because-I buy-less-crap-than-you-do-and-the-crap-I-do-buy-comes-from-a-thrift-store days, I ooh’d and ahh’d with the best of them over the same plastic junk.  And purchased far more than my fair share of it, so who the H-E-double-hockeysticks am I to judge anyway?

The best I can do is try to educate by example – because everyone knows that nobody likes a smart-assed know it all, even if she IS right. 

Let the Wild Rumpus Start!

Today is college tour day – did you know that? Well, its true! In addition to being Veterans Day, it also happens to be the day I’m touring various and sundry schools with Gypsy, queen of the kids who can’t make up their minds what they want to be when they grow up.
I can’t complain though, since I’m pretty sure she inherited that from me.
*sigh*
Off we go to prospective college #4…

On this Day in 2009, Absolutely Nothing Happened…

Another quilt front is finished, on the, er, quilt front.  Christmas is sneaking up on me and I’ve still got one more to cut out and sew.  But, it looks like I can have that all done in the next day or two and then it’s just a matter of time till all 4 are completely completed.   

Gypsy and I are planning a few Saturdays at the Michael’s store nearby for their free holiday craft demonstrations, so that is something we’re really looking forward to.  Other than that, it’s been a busy couple of days, and I’ve been a cleaning/tidying/caulking/painting madwoman – nothing like impending holidays and the promise of a houseful of family to set the nesting instinct into overdrive!

Now, don’t tell anyone, but I fear that I’m becoming a bit of a bore.  Yesterday, Freddy was talking about a dirt track he and the boys are building for motocross bikes and all I could bring to the table was what a miraculous job a very inexpensive toilet cleaner did on the hardwater stains.  Is this what I’ve come to?  A woman who ooh’s and ahh’s over pristine white porcelain while wearing her ”I give up” sweatpants??  Up until August, I didn’t even OWN a pair of sweatpants!

Ah well, I reckon there is nothing wrong with lack of daily excitement – it means no one ends up in jail or the emergency room…

Moody

I’ve been missing in action for a few days – I’m not really sure what was up with that other than an overall feeling of irritation/disgust with humanity in general.  Weird, right?  But as with all moods, it passed and today feels much cheerier and therefore suitable for blogging. 

Yesterday, Gypsy, Skye and I ran errands which was quite fun (in spite of my human-driven crabbiness).  We went to the bread outlet store and stocked up on several loaves of Wonder Bread (Freddy still prefers white bread for all purposes – the nutritionally bankrupt type), for a mere 3 dollars.  I’m pretty sure that one loaf costs about that in the grocery store, so it felt like we really came out winners!  We had to buy black jeans for Skye for her job and guess what?  She found 2 pairs on the clearance rack for $8.00 a piece!  I bought them both so she wouldn’t have to wash one pair over and over again. 

On a completely different front, I’ve come to the conclusion that I must have a schedule for housekeeping.  Without it, it’s far too easy to put off housework for other, more exciting projects and it’s not fair to my family to walk into a house that isn’t clean.  I’ve always tended to be a bit of a perfectionist regarding cleanliness in the past, but working a full-time-and-then-some job made scrubbing and sweeping seem a whole lot harder than it should be.  So tidying in lieu of deep down cleansing became the habit which I now must redirect.  In the summertime I can honestly say I had very, very little time for spotlessness, but with winter practically here, there is no excuse for dog hair on the hardwood or dust on the ceiling fan!  Anyway, I’ve written a schedule and so far I’ve been sticking to it - my house has never looked/felt better!  (And it’s a wise woman who spends time tending her home when she’s too moody for socializing – it saves all sorts of snarky attitudes and hurt feelings.)

Today is for sewing – Karen Sue, where are you at with your quilts?  I’ve got to cut all the flannel/plaid (“flaid”) squares for Freddy’s quilt, and sew together all the rows for Ricky’s quilt and before next weekend, I will be able to begin stitching together and then tying all the layers!  FINALLY!

Holiday Perspective

Does anyone get the impression that retailers are scared silly about this holiday shopping season?  Didn’t it seem weird to have all those Christmas commercials and aisles of holiday candy before Halloween was even here?  Because to me, a walk through orange and black aisles, amidst the decorative skulls and mummy costumes and candy bowls with automatic grabbing hands, was made even creepier because Peggy Lee was “Rockin Around the Christmas Tree” (quite loudly) in the background.

Insert mini rant here:  Can anyone tell me why there isn’t some Constitutional Amendment regarding the separation of holidays?  Sure, we have some law regarding the division of Church and State, but what about the division of Halloween and Christmas?  It should be illegal to plant all that green and red so close to the orange and black – doesn’t anyone notice how they all clash?? 

K, all done with the rant.  Now, my point to this is that if our government is saying that we’re on the upturn, that things are looking better, why are retailers bombarding us so early in hopes of making enough sales this holiday season to keep themselves afloat?  And does it make me a bad person to not support chain stores by making so many of my own gifts this year?  (I don’t really care if it does make me a bad person, actually, I’m just pondering this all)  That message of “spend, spend, SPEND (mortgage your house if you have to)” is lost on me these days, so now when I witness all this pandering for money, I’m amused instead of panic stricken. 

I remember back to when Freddy and I were just starting out, when our girls were practically babies.  We had next to no money for the holidays.  How much fun it was to sew them cute clothes to wear with sometimes matching outfits for their dollies and blankets for doll cribs!  I also remember the first Christmas we had money and how our living room looked like a pink nightmare with all that Barbie stuff strewn everywhere.  I remember that holiday feeling rushed and less authentic somehow, and it only got worse every year after that.   

But, with less income than time these days, we’ve made some changes. 

Gone are the days when I freak out over whether I’ve spent enough on each person’s gifts.  Gone are the days when I keep buying and buying and buying for every single person I’ve ever met.  Gone are the days when I purchase stupid and senseless junk for people who are already buried in stupid and senseless junk they’ve already bought for themselves.

Think hard about what’s really important in your life - are the holidays really about an endless supply of silk ties or Bob Marley t-shirts?  Do your kids still have and play with all the toys they got for Christmas last year?  If so, you are way ahead of me already! 

Combat the hype this year – sew something.  Build something with wood or clay.  Take someone to a special movie or dinner.  Bake a few cookies.  Celebrate the holidays with people you love and who love you back – it won’t cost you a thing but time and you’ll remember it a whole lot longer than you’ll be able to recall what you unwrapped from under the tree! 

This Christmas stands to be one of my family’s best ever!  Yes, there will be some money spent, but probably close to a full 3/4 less than before.  And oddly, perhaps even miraculously, I don’t think a soul will mind.

On the Quilt Front

I’ve completed front #2, with 2 more to go.  Then I can start adding the innards and backs before tying.  Looks like if I keep at it, I’ll have them all complete well before Christmas!  Go me! 

Words simply cannot express how blessed I feel to have the gift of time that allows me to create these blankets for my family this year.

Without further ado, here is what Gypsy’s looks like so far:

A semi-random pattern, with a few planned “stair steps.”

This yellow square has a doily stitched to it that my Grandma Derby tatted years ago.

Another doily in a yellow square, this time crocheted, I believe. Also, the orange flower piece is from an old sundress I had.

Oh, and one more thing.  Skye and I drove to the country place yesterday, to make sure the cats have food/water, and to grab the mail.  Apparently the property out there was as heavily hit with snow as we were in town – there were so many broken tree limbs, it will take Freddy and I days and days to clean it all up.  *sigh*  Oh well, I guess it’s free firewood for next year, once it all cures up…